"You don't have to push or pull or fight or win, the struggle is illusory. Sometimes or rather, all times, you just have to be". Andrew McMaon
Man wouldn't it be great to live like that just letting it be. Yet we humans constantly struggle with all of the noise in our heads - or at least this human does. So many rules, expectations and so many shoulds. Right now some of my shoulds include : it shouldn't be hard to write, and it shouldn't be hard to exercise and the biggest should of all - Bob, shouldn't be dead and yet - Bob IS dead, and my sweet sister who is only 65 years old is a widow and my nephews and nieces will never see their father again.
To accept that life is hard - filled with loss, fear and pain actually allows for less struggle. To give up the idea that I will always be happy & comfortable allows space for what is there and I can move through it more quickly and honestly. To accept that Bob is dead allows me to grieve and to move through it rather than railing at the unfairness of a man being diagnosed with cancer 2 months after his retirement. To rail against what is usually causes resentment and bitterness. It makes sense that I have pain over the loss of my brother in law and lots of sadness for the pain his family is experiencing.
Maybe its ok to let it be. If someone falls in quicksand the more they struggle the quicker they sink. Its very counter intuitive but in quick sand stay still and calm and the body will rise to the top and then you can roll out. Like quicksand, in life when we struggle against things we make them even harder - let go and just let them be. Its not about giving up - its about giving up the struggle so you can have the energy to do things that you enjoy in life and get closer to your goals.